Healthy relationships do not just happen. There is an art and science to building strong relationships. Romantic relationships are important for our happiness and well-being. Yet with more than 40 percent of new marriages ending in divorce, it’s clear that relationships aren’t always easy. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to keep your romantic partnership in good working order.
These are indispensable tips, written with romantic relationships in mind, but with a little modification you can apply them to your friendships, family, and even work relationships.
1. Do the things you did the first year you were dating.
As the months and years roll on, we tend to slink into our proverbial sweatpants and get lazy in our relationship. We lose our patience, gentleness, thoughtfulness, understanding and the general effort we once made toward our mate. Think back to the first year of your relationship and write down all the things you used to do for your partner. Now start doing them again.
2. Let go of anxieties
We often worry about a zillion things and when in a relationship, it isn’t just about you anymore; you think about your partner, how he or she is going to take your tensions and more importantly how they are going to judge you. It is okay to let go, loosen up and it sure is a stepping stone for better understanding and love for each other. So let go of anxieties and you will be calmer and happier than before.
3. Create a safe environment where you can trust and share openly without fear.
Don’t interrupt, even if you need to put your hand over your mouth to stop yourself. Learn to fight fairly. No name calling. Don’t make threats. Apologize when you know you should. If you’re too angry to really listen, stop! Go into another room, take space for yourself, breathe, and calm down.
Remember: your partner is not the enemy.